


Soap Me Up

by Spuri



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Adult Entertainment Industry, Cultural Differences, M/M, Miscommunication, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 13:32:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8403538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spuri/pseuds/Spuri
Summary: Victor has picked up some... faulty information about the services provided at a Japanese bathhouse. Yuuri just wants to curl up and die.





	

**Author's Note:**

> ..help, this show is taking over my brain...
> 
> Also, see end notes for explanations/info on some of the terms used in this fic.

“Yuuri!” came the call from outside his bedroom door.

 

Yuuri sighed and got up from his computer. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate Victor’s enthusiasm, or that he wasn’t flattered that _Victor_ , of all people, wanted to spend seemingly all his time with _him_ , just plain old Yuuri, but sometimes, it was maybe just a little bit annoying. Not that he’d ever say so out loud, because this was _Victor_ , and complaining about any part of his presence seemed to be a great way to have karma smack you over the head.

 

“Yes?” Yuuri said as he opened the door and let Victor in. Honestly, he was just glad that Victor respected his privacy enough to not just burst into the room without permission, and that he’d managed to hide all those damning posters, because he was fairly certain he’d die of shame if Victor ever found those.

 

“I’m so disappointed, Yuuri, why didn’t you tell me?” Victor said as he entered the room and slumped down on Yuuri’s bed so hard he bounced just a little. He was wearing a sulky pout that should seem ridiculous on a grown man, and yet, somehow he made it work. Maybe it was the expressive ice-blue eyes, or his delicate features, but a pouting Victor Nikiforov didn’t make you want to laugh at him, it made you want to make it all better, somehow. In fact, Yuuri was fairly certain it was the most effective pout he’d ever seen in his life, which was completely unfair. Admittedly, Yuuri was no expert on being on the receiving end of pouts, but surely that was the kind of thing that was only supposed to work for small children and cute girls?

 

“Didn’t tell you what?” Yuuri asked, truly bewildered as he settled on his computer chair and turned it towards the bed. Where had this come from, all of a sudden?

 

“About Japanese bathhouses!” Victor exclaimed, apparently indignant that Yuuri wasn’t magically on the same page as him, though it was hard to tell if the indignation was real or fake. It always was, with Victor. “I was talking to a friend back in Russia about my stay here, and he was asking about the service, and I had no idea what he was talking about! I don’t like being made to look like a fool, Yuuri.”

 

Any sternness in his voice was completely ruined - okay, 85% ruined, because Victor was kind of intimidating at the best of times - by his pout growing even more prominent.

 

Yuuri frowned, wondering what on earth Victor was on about. “The service? I’m pretty sure it’s been the same here at  _ Yu~topia _ as you’d find in most  _ onsen _ in Japan?”

 

“There’s no need to be shy, Yuuri, it’s completely normal. I’m just wondering why you’ve never offered to wash me when we’ve been to the bath. Even if I’m your coach, I’m still a guest here, aren’t I?”

 

Yuuri simply stared. Why would he offer to wash Victor in the bath? Did Victor mean washing his back, perhaps? How was he supposed to explain that washing someone’s back was kind of an intimate act of bonding that Yuuri wouldn’t feel comfortable doing it with  _ any _ of the coaches he’d ever had, never mind someone as intimidating as Victor, who still felt like he was from a different world? Because knowing Victor,telling him it was a bonding act - and an intimate one at that - would just make him want it  _ more _ .

 

But wait, Victor had specified as a  _ guest _ . Why on earth would Yuuri wash  _ any _ part of a guest’s-...

 

His eyes widened in realization, and he could feel his face all but burst into flame. “Victor!” he protested. “This is an  _ onsen _ , not a  _ soap _ !!!”

 

Victor cocked his head in bafflement. “What’s the difference? It’s called-... ooh, I know this one, uh, the water trade, right?”

 

“Where on earth did you learn that term?!” Yuuri hissed, trying to tamp down the note of hysteria in his voice, but it was hard to when Victor was talking about the  _ water trade _ , like it was no big deal. “Never mind, just forget it right this instant. Don’t ever say that ever again, and especially not about  _ Yu~topia _ , or any other  _ onsen _ !” A sudden thought struck him, and he could almost  _ feel  _ the blood draining from his face. “You didn’t ask my sister about this, right?  _ Please _ tell me you didn’t.”

 

“Of course not, Yuuri,” Victor said, and he seemed offended by the mere notion. Then he smiled one of his entirely too brilliant smiles. “I wanted  _ you _ to do the washing.”

 

“ _ Victor _ !” Yuuri hissed, scandalized. He could feel his face heating up again, and he was pretty sure he was going to get dizzy pretty soon, with his blood rushing all over the place like this. “You realize what you’re talking about is  _ prostitution _ !”

 

Yuuri was ashamed to even know that word in English, but the, uh, subject had come up one or two times, back in Detroit. Not that Yuuri himself had ever-... of  _ course _ not, but when you lived basically on top of a bunch of guys, most of whom didn’t have a lot of time for socializing outside of skating practice, you inevitably heard a thing or two. Plus, it was nice to know what neighborhoods to avoid.

 

“Yuuri, have you been prostituting yourself? I thought you said you didn’t have any experience with eros.”

 

Yuuri could not believe he was having this conversation. There was nothing he wanted more than to just crawl into a hole somewhere and never come out. He covered his face with his hands and groaned out loud. “That’s why I’m telling you,  _ onsen _ and  _ soap  _ are  _ not _ the same! You won’t find that kind of thing here! Why did your friend know about this in the first place?! No, actually, never mind, I don’t want to know.”

 

“So, does this mean you’re not gonna soap me up real good and wash me?” Victor asked, and his voice was doing that sultry, silky thing, damn him. This wasn’t  _ funny _ .

 

Yuuri removed his hands from his face to give his coach an incredulous stare, trying to ignore how hot his entire  _ head _ felt, at this point. “ _ No! _ ”

 

Victor pouted again, but there was no way Yuuri was ever falling for his pouts again. Victor’s pouts were  _ evil _ , and not to be trusted, and you should definitely never even consider wanting to help make the pout go away.  _ Ever _ . Yuuri glared at him for full measure, to show how very little he was falling for that.

 

Well, glared a  _ little _ . Victor was still his coach, and, y’know,  _ Victor Nikiforov.  _ As a skater, one simply did not glare at what might as well be skating  _ royalty _ .

 

With a sigh, Victor shoved himself off of the bed, as elegantly as he did everything else. “That’s a shame,” he said, as he headed for the door.

 

Yuuri blinked at him in stunned silence before squeaking. “ _ What _ ?!”

 

Victor sent him one of his blinding smiles, and winked. “Good night, Yuuri,” he said, voice warm, and he left the room long before Yuuri could get his brain moving enough to even think of replying.

 

He simply gaped at the now-closed door, wondering what on  _ earth _ just happened. And also how this was his life.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Did Victor really think this was a service provided, or was he just messing with Yuuri? Who knows!
> 
> Quick explanation: ["Soaps" or "soaplands"](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soapland) are an actual thing in Japan, though you're more likely to come across them in larger cities. I'm not just saying that because wikipedia, I have held the actual recruitment posters in my hand. Some of them will operate legally, and it will literally just be washing (and conversation, I guess). Others will... offer other services that aren't necessarily on the official menu, let's just put it that way.
> 
> [The water trade](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mizu_sh%C5%8Dbai), or mizu shoubai refers to the nighttime/adult entertainment industry in Japan. Some of it's fairly decent, some of it... isn't, but anyway, it's not the kind of thing a family-owned and family-friendly onsen would like to consider itself a part of.
> 
> Also, it is totally my headcanon that Victor and Yuuri communicate in English. I've got several reasons to suspect this and to support this headcanon, but that's not a subject for the author's notes.
> 
> There were quite a few Japanese cultural tropes and things in here, so if anything was unclear, drop me a comment, or poke me on [tumblr](http://spurisani.tumblr.com/). I'm always happy to hear from you guys!


End file.
